Author Topic: Feelings  (Read 37690 times)

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Forgotten_Bard

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #15 on: March 23, 2009, 04:00:39 PM »
Oh... sorry to totally rain on anyone's parade, but I found it a wee bit cheesy. Like seriously, they totally planned a party without calling the mom? And why did the random employee totally let the mom use the oven? There were also some distracting typo-y things, but it definitely could be REALLY REALLY good! All that stuff would be super easy to fix, I think. Sorry, Reives, but on the bright side, everybody else liked it!

Perhaps you didn't understand what happened very well.

This is what happened (correct me if I am wrong, Reives):

Spoiler: show
The boy's parents are separated.  The girl he goes out with is his sister, and the house they go to is their father's.  It's the boy's birthday, and the past year his mom had promised him a cake, but due to their situation, she couldn't make it.  But this year, she would do everything she could to make that cake for her son.
So, while the boy was playing carelessly with his sister at their father's home, the mom started preparing the cake.  It may be a small town, and the small business owners may well know her (as it usually happens in small towns, where everybody knows who is who), and since they trust her, they let her use their instruments for the occasion.  Especially knowing her condition.  What's wrong with solidarity?
Anyway, the boy is with his father and sister (and step-mother?), and suddenly it's decided that they'll make the boy a birthday party.  Because the father's condition allows, he can get him the best cake, and the best party, unlike the mother.  So the boy decides to stay and celebrate the birthday with his father that year, possibly forgetting his mother's promise of a cake at home due to the excitement of having a real birthday party.
Meanwhile, after going through all that sacrifice to make the cake for her son, the mother finally finishes, and all that is left now is to wait for the boy to come back home, and celebrate together.  But the boy doesn't come.  And all that work, all that love, is wasted away.


I don't find that cheesy, simply because I can understand the mother and the son.  My parents divorced when I was still like 3 years old (maybe less), and in complicated circumstances that affected my childhood and marked me forever; so it was always like this.  I had no choice but to decide every year where and with whom to be.  It always felt as if I had to divide my own self in two equal parts, but I couldn't do that.  I had to be in one place at a time.  Either with mom, or with dad.
As for the mother, I imagine all the sacrifices that my own mom has made for my brother and myself ever since we were born.  Being a mother and father, basically.  Because most of the time, our fathers weren't there for us, and it was mom who did everything.  And I thank her and love her for that.  She's a great woman, a hard-worker, and a wonderful mother.

As children, we tend to be careless, and don't realize all the things that our parents do for us.  And sometimes, without knowing, we hurt their feelings.  Because only they know what they've been through, just to make us happy and give us what we need.  And as teenagers, we are ungrateful, selfish, and again, careless.  So once again, we hurt our parents with words and mistakes that may well cost them all that sacrifice.

Well said...

I guess you either have to know others in that situation or be in that situation yourself to understand the depth of the story...
A letter, a word
...
A sentence, a paragraph
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A page, a story
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A book, a novel.
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They all mean so little when you can't take time to put your soul into the work.

abigailian

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #16 on: March 23, 2009, 05:57:00 PM »
Crap, my response didn't go through earlier.

My problem is not the story. The story in and of itself isn't cheesy, I just thought it could have been done a little more effectively. For instance, the employee at the bakery is one of the few people the mom comes in contact with who DOESN'T seem to know her. Had there been a hint of recognition, it would have made a lot more sense. Furthermore, I'm really easily bothered by grammar/spelling errors, so that took my enjoyment down a couple notches. But yeah, I definitely understood the story, and even though I can't relate very well, I do think it's very moving, it's just there were a couple of things that detracted from my enjoyment.
This might hurt, it's not safe / But I know that I've gotta make a change / I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something


Reives

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #17 on: March 23, 2009, 06:25:56 PM »
As been said, divorced parents in many cases aren't exactly "at peace" per se.

The grammar and spelling errors weren't in part the badly attempted kiddie accent right? o: Speaking of which, I should probably take those off anyway since it's been getting plenty of criticisms on its own.

I actually did give a nod to that baker in the commentary;
Quote
The baker's portrayed as one of the nicer/merrier parts of this story - as there are many great people around who lend a helping hand; I wanted to at least put in some cheerful characters here or it'd get way too under.
In this case I don't really see why it's strange for a stranger to help out another stranger at no cost of their own - I mean I know that this story isn't filled with the most helpful people around, but there can still exist nice people, right? All the baker has to do is to place the pot in the oven, which as she mentioned, is on all day anyway. Even I myself have helped strangers with way more hassle-some tasks than that.

(Don't get me wrong though, I'm certain that there are many things in this that doesn't come through as properly as it should. Just addressing the specific points brought up.)


Forgotten_Bard

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #18 on: March 23, 2009, 06:33:35 PM »
Also... isn't it Christmas time or something?
A letter, a word
...
A sentence, a paragraph
...
A page, a story
...
A book, a novel.
...
They all mean so little when you can't take time to put your soul into the work.

abigailian

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #19 on: March 23, 2009, 07:05:57 PM »
In this case I don't really see why it's strange for a stranger to help out another stranger at no cost of their own - I mean I know that this story isn't filled with the most helpful people around, but there can still exist nice people, right? All the baker has to do is to place the pot in the oven, which as she mentioned, is on all day anyway. Even I myself have helped strangers with way more hassle-some tasks than that.

(Don't get me wrong though, I'm certain that there are many things in this that doesn't come through as properly as it should. Just addressing the specific points brought up.)

Well, part of it, too was for some reason the baker didn't strike me as THE baker, more like an employee. So I thought it was wierd that they didn't at least go ask the owner, since it wasn't their bakery. Yeah, I'm all for random acts of kindness, but something didn't quite click in that interaction, especially since so many other people are greeting the mom and asking about her son and obviously know her and seem to want to help, without the opportunity.

If I watched it again, I could probably point out some of the grammar issues, because some of them were obviously intentional for the children or colloquialisms, but some of them weren't. And yeah, I accept that the mom being unaware of her son's prolonged stay is an important part of the plot, but... I don't know, the way it plays out doesn't quite make sense to me.
This might hurt, it's not safe / But I know that I've gotta make a change / I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something


Reives

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #20 on: March 23, 2009, 07:18:18 PM »
Eh, no one asked the mom about her son at all? There were a total of 3 interactions between the mom and in-store/shop NPCs;

1. Cashier:
Quote
\p[1]"Mornin'! \.\.Up to some Christmas shopping?"
Quote
"Oh, \.really?\.\. What a date for it,\. huh?"
[Implied surprise when the mother tells him that her son's birthday is around Christmas.]

2. Restaurant:
Quote
"Merr' Christmas, ma'am! \.\.What would you like?"
Quote
\p[3]"Oh, \.\.that. . . \.\.That won't be enough, \.ma'am."
Quote
\p[3]"Wait. . . \.\.Isn't that some more in your bag?"
(Implication of the mother telling him that the rest is reserved for the son's birthday present.)
Quote
\p[3]"Ooh,\.\. I see.\.\.\.\.Well,\. best wishes to him from me!"

3. Baker:
Never brings up the son.


No one really deliberately asks to help her, but are all merely greeting with cheery/enthusiastic tones/attitudes - as I thought is pretty common during Christmas seasons (around here, at least).


Forgotten_Bard

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #21 on: March 23, 2009, 07:26:12 PM »
what I have come to note is there is always a worldly view and personal view on everything you play or make.
A letter, a word
...
A sentence, a paragraph
...
A page, a story
...
A book, a novel.
...
They all mean so little when you can't take time to put your soul into the work.

abigailian

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #22 on: March 23, 2009, 07:47:50 PM »
Yes, I think Reives proved I took my impressions regarding the other characters for facts.

Tell you what, I think I shall replay it, take screenies of the typos and stuff, and then tell you what I think.
This might hurt, it's not safe / But I know that I've gotta make a change / I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something


Forgotten_Bard

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #23 on: March 23, 2009, 07:53:20 PM »
never hurts to do a second look.
A letter, a word
...
A sentence, a paragraph
...
A page, a story
...
A book, a novel.
...
They all mean so little when you can't take time to put your soul into the work.

Reives

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #24 on: March 23, 2009, 10:35:32 PM »
Sure, thanks Abi. :~

Delphinus

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #25 on: April 12, 2009, 02:30:10 AM »
I'm not person who likes to cry   :-\ But it makes me very sad

koon no kami

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #26 on: May 23, 2009, 02:31:11 AM »
didn't exactly made me cry but it sure was a depressing storyline. ; )
mmh if you should watch " a little princess sara " ( one of my fav. anime ) and make a sara VGA, it would mostly have the same feel i guess. just be way longer and even a lot moar more painful XD
nyanyanya~!

Legacyblade

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #27 on: June 01, 2009, 03:10:36 AM »
It was a depressing storyline, but it did not make me cry. I watched it just after a similar thing had happened to me though. Twas not a happy day.

ThoSha

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #28 on: June 01, 2009, 10:45:03 AM »
Oh boy, that was really touching.  :'(
I was in the same situation either, and watching this made me understand my mother a lot better.
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LunaStar

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Re: Feelings
« Reply #29 on: June 14, 2009, 05:08:44 PM »
I think this was a very touching story. I mean, it was obvious how the story was going to end from around the middle part, while the mom was baking the cake in town, but it was still very sad to see it played out.

What I want to see is part 2: the next day because honestly, how would a mother respond to that kind of treatment from her child? She can't scold him too much or he'll just go live with dad and if she acts like nothing happened, she'll probably drive herself insane. But I think it would be very comical to see her screaming at her son for his irresponsibility.  ;D 
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