Author Topic: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!  (Read 4464 times)

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Ruben

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I don't know where exactly this is from, but I had to laugh a few times.  :vikonsmile:

1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"

2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.

4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.

5. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.

6. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min.

7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.

8. Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.

9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.

10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

11. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.

12. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.

13. Get the exam. 20 min into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Fuck this!" and walk out triumphantly.

14. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (ie. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink.)

15. Show up completely drunk (completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).

16. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.

17. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.

18. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.

19. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.

20. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.

21. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.

22. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave.

23. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, then cough. Repeat if necessary.

24. Masturbate.

25. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"

26. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!

27. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.

28. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"

29. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.

30. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.

31. In the middle of the test, have a friend rush into the classroom, tag your hand, and resume taking your test for you. When the teacher asks what's going on, calmly explain the rules of Tag Team Testing to him/her.

32. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."

33. Stand up after about 15 minutes, and say loudly, "Okay, let's double-check our answers! Number one, A. Number two, C. Number three, E...."

34. Fake an orgasm. When interrupted, apologize, and explain that question #__ moved you, deeply.

35. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. strike a pose first for added effect.

36. Tailgate outside the classroom before the exam.


Which ones do you like most?

Ronnie

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #1 on: November 18, 2009, 04:11:53 PM »
My favourite ones are 2, 19, 28, 34 :D

This is a big-big LOL. xD
Unfortunately I have a test tomorrow and I don't know anything for it... but my teacher is also the headmaster, so I'd bring great trouble on myself...
But I may print this and show it to my classmates XD
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Just Lance

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #2 on: November 18, 2009, 04:31:57 PM »
Well I heard it, but many of those suggestions can't be done here. :(
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"God, it's so hard to be a smartass nowadays." Dr. Neil Watts (To the Moon)

KuidonNZ

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #3 on: November 18, 2009, 05:11:42 PM »
Lol, sounds like fun.  :vikonsmile:
I do have a big exam tomorrow...
I could try but it is run by the government and if I piss off the instructor I think they can make me fail the year...  ::)

Anyway, my favs would be... 7, 12, 18, 21 and 32.  :reivsmile:
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Moony

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #4 on: November 18, 2009, 05:28:40 PM »
These are hilarious :P
I remember reading from www.mylifeisaverage.com about number 35 and how teacher was so confused he/she didn´t finish his/her lecture C:
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soranokira

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #5 on: November 18, 2009, 08:50:40 PM »
so many of them are awesome, that i can't list all my favorites.
i can't stop laughing.
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Amaranth

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #6 on: November 18, 2009, 09:06:16 PM »
Three, four, thirteen, SEVENTEEN (:D), twenty-six, twenty-eight, thirty-one, and thirty-five.

But whoever added thirty to the list is DUMB. That never works!!!

And eight . . . I want to bash that person's head in. "Oh, sure! Let's fake a condition and stigmatize the people who actually have it even more than we already do!"

People with mental and physical issues are the last frontier for bullies. If you make fun of anybody else, you're a horrible evil person, but if the target's somebody with a handicap, you get a pat on the back. WTF.
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Vasha

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2009, 06:55:18 PM »
yeah these are all pretty good, though the one about terets is so mean

Just Lance

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #8 on: November 21, 2009, 07:32:18 AM »
I used nuber 4. for my test from "Czech literature" (Because this is about everything but not Czech literature...)
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"God, it's so hard to be a smartass nowadays." Dr. Neil Watts (To the Moon)

Leeor

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #9 on: November 23, 2009, 02:37:56 PM »
35 Is not the maker's idea. its an old one :P


I have one!

37. Have a bikini\swimsuit under your clothes (guy\girl respectively) and bring a surfboard in a large case. At the test, put your phone to your ear and yell something creative about going to the beach. take off your upper clothes, take the board out of the case and leave the class running and laughing happily. for added effect pull out some sunblock and ask the instructor to smear it on you...

Reives

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #10 on: November 23, 2009, 03:07:24 PM »
How about this? :P

Spoiler: show
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLvw7AjmGf4[/youtube]
« Last Edit: November 23, 2009, 08:02:05 PM by Reives »

Just Lance

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #11 on: November 23, 2009, 03:47:46 PM »
How about this? :P

Spoiler: show
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLvw7AjmGf4[/youtube]



Yeah! That got me. LOL! :D
« Last Edit: November 23, 2009, 08:01:47 PM by Reives »
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"God, it's so hard to be a smartass nowadays." Dr. Neil Watts (To the Moon)

Reives

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #12 on: November 23, 2009, 08:02:52 PM »
I think #14 wouldn't really be much of a "threat" to the prof though. :P In fact it makes it much easier for him/her.

Stardale

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #13 on: November 24, 2009, 09:30:18 AM »
Guess what! We did nos. 11-21 today! Even the teacher was surprised she laughed and surprised us as well that the quiz is not recorded into the class record. Nice one. doitdoitdoit

Reives

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Re: 36 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You Are Going To Fail It Anyways!
« Reply #14 on: November 24, 2009, 04:20:32 PM »
Oh wow, she took off the quiz? That's pretty awesome.