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Community (Misc.) => General => Debates/Serious Discussions => Topic started by: Merlandese on February 21, 2014, 11:30:25 AM

Title: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Merlandese on February 21, 2014, 11:30:25 AM
How do you feel about the concept of a Soul Mate? Is there one person on the planet that is perfect for you?

Is there such a thing as "The One," or a True Love? How do you know when you've found them? Or is it all just a game of finding someone who is the best fit?
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Just Lance on February 21, 2014, 01:59:49 PM
While I think there is a person in the world that is a "soul mate" to another someone I don't really think that being a soul mate transplants to being best couple or lovers or whatever you want to call it. To me being a soul mate is being a person that understands me on a different level that you would expect from a normal relationship of friends or lovers. I would not decline that being a soul mate might have a positive influence on romantic relationship but I don't think it's a necessary factor of being a soul mate.

Is there such a thing as true love? Well since the definition of love can't be completely explained/rationalized I can neither deny or confirm the existence of true love any more than I can confirm or deny existence of cosmic "Dark matter".
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: ~ on February 27, 2014, 08:00:48 AM
How do you feel about the concept of a Soul Mate? Is there one person on the planet that is perfect for you?

Hell naw bro!

Well, statistically someone is likely to exist that presses all my buttons correctly however, again statistically, it's unlikely that I'll ever meet them. In the meantime I'll probably settle for less because I'd like to share at least a little of my life and experiences with someone cuddly before I die.

I think this approach has a nice practicality to it rather than the jarring biting cynicism of dismissal.

Because cynicism is really sad, even if you only exist on the internet.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Ruben on February 27, 2014, 09:35:32 AM
Well, no, perfection is not something that is ever meant to be achieved.

Also: People develop and change. Relationships also change once people get known better to each other, or once a certain routine dominates the daily life. And it takes a long time, many years possibly, to really know a person. You can't call someone you just met a "perfect match" because that might be a fleeting first impression.

Don't get me wrong, it is certainly possible that two people get along so well that something like "perfection" doesn't even matter. But it's not in the nature of a human to be satisfied forever, and we always tend to desire things we don't have or know, even things that might arguably not even be good for us.

 
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: SinnyVic on February 27, 2014, 03:16:45 PM
How do you feel about the concept of a Soul Mate?
The concept seems plausible. However, I don't know if we can statistically claim or calculate that a soul mate exists (if we're limiting soulmates to being humans). I don't know if we have enough research done in the field of human genetics to be able to make that claim. Plus, one should also account for variations of humans due to the nature vs nurture argument.


Is there one person on the planet that is perfect for you?
This is impossible. You are looking for someone that only exists in your imagination that you can't even fully conceptualize. Even if you were to find someone with just a hint of that "perfection," you would just be satisficing. Furthermore, to maintain that blurry conceptualized perfection, you will have to remain static (i.e. unchanging) for the rest of your life.


Is there such a thing as "The One," or a True Love?
Perhaps. But, it's far more likely to meet "The Some" that you are most compatible with.


How do you know when you've found them?
You don't have to convince yourself that you like/love them. Additionally, you can also possibly be in sync with said person(s) i.e. a deeper level of understanding between you and said person(s) exists.


Or is it all just a game of finding someone who is the best fit?
Life is but a game. You are the one who chooses what to think and what actions to take. But, sometimes, you have to act on your instinct and let your mind justify it; for better or worse.



P.S. - My soul mates are tacos. Hard shell tacos.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Tumbles on February 27, 2014, 06:34:25 PM
I think the idea of a soulmate is an outdated, spiritual concept. Besides, it's depressing if true, and it's depressing if it's not true. Allow me to elaborate!

If the concept is true, well that means that everyone in the world is destined to be with one other person. Now, let's say that someone starts dating someone that isn't their soulmate. It's not a perfect couple, but they've given up trying to find the "one", so they get married. BOOM, now they'll never be with their soulmate, and they've both left their soulmates stranded as well. Of course, that's a silly theory, because I think that soulmates are silly.

Now, if the concept isn't true, it's a little depressing, because it means that we actually have to do some work instead of the universe. I'm not saying that there isn't someone out there who's "perfect" for you, but I'm just saying that it isn't predestined. I like the idea of soulmates not being real, because it gives life meaning beyond relationships.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: ~ on February 27, 2014, 08:00:00 PM
Perfection is a funny little word. It's extremely subjective but people often treat it like an objective concept. I could define my own idea of a perfect match as "a female human" and BOOM, instantly half the world is a perfect match. Defining perfection too stringently only hurts.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Ruben on February 27, 2014, 10:30:05 PM
^Which is why I usually avoid using this word.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Merlandese on February 28, 2014, 12:22:36 AM
Perfection is a funny little word. It's extremely subjective but people often treat it like an objective concept.

Is there one person on the planet that is perfect for you?

It's totally subjective, but the concept behind the question is that of perfection "for you." That not only implies that everyone has a different "perfect" person (what I would say is the meaning of a Soul Mate if they can be assumed to be real), but that you don't necessarily know what's perfect for you.

I think in the subject of Soul Mates, the word "perfect" is not only acceptable, but necessary.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Oink on March 11, 2014, 04:33:55 PM
These dayz, the words "soul mates" just churn cheese. I guess there really are couples and friends who do consider each other so, but I get irritated ta death whenever I see some twopenny worth o' romcom tryin' to emulate this ... or worse, tryin' to troll it but fall flat.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Fl0x on March 11, 2014, 04:36:52 PM
Perfect for me?
No.

Perfect for my blade?
Yes. Many.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Tumbles on March 11, 2014, 11:25:01 PM
Perfect for me?
No.

Perfect for my blade?
Yes. Many.

Spoken like the true Simon Blackquill.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Kyo on March 12, 2014, 05:06:53 AM
Perfect for me?
No.

Perfect for my blade?
Yes. Many.

Spoken like the true Simon Blackquill.
Or a true emo kid.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Just Lance on March 12, 2014, 07:01:42 AM
Is it me or someone had overdosed with Psycho sprinkles recently?
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Fl0x on March 12, 2014, 09:09:21 AM
Is it me or someone had overdosed with Psycho sprinkles recently?

(https://freebirdgames.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F24.media.tumblr.com%2F089f371811aff6e9a6ea348e9cfa3bb9%2Ftumblr_myyr10A8WS1sl47ggo1_500.gif&hash=af6143698c759304407a35499b6663b8)
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Juice Box on March 13, 2014, 08:28:56 AM
No, I don't believe in a "soul mate."

And I'm frankly fine with it. I'd honestly rather have an imperfect partner than a perfect one.

Because, I don't know--if you have an imperfect partner, then he'll try to be perfect for you, which I personally think is better than perfection itself. See my signature for more details.

But anyways, statistically, there will be a person out there with absolutely the same likes and dislikes. Someone who is willing to listen the unique story we all possess called, "our lives." But I don't believe that that person is "destined" to meet you.

I don't believe in destiny. I don't believe that everything we do is worthless, but I don't believe in destiny. I believe that the path we choose to take is not predetermined--it can be influenced by the people around us, and there are some parts of it that we can't change, but what we do in that path is still ultimately up to us.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Merlandese on March 13, 2014, 02:23:55 PM
Because, I don't know--if you have an imperfect partner, then he'll try to be perfect for you, which I personally think is better than perfection itself. See my signature for more details.

I think your signature says it best, but doesn't that create a sort of implicit desire for your perfect mate? If the best kind of person you personally could be with is one who always tries to make themselves better for you, that type of person is more "perfect" than the alternative. That imperfection makes them perfect. The trick, of course, being that for that phrase to work, the word "perfect" is slightly different, but that last word in the phrase--the "makes humans perfect"--heavily implies that there is a personal standard of perfection being met.

It seems weird to float around this term so much, but I think Soul Mates are personalized perfection in their definition. To have ideals about what makes a mate best for you is to decide where they fit on a line between Perfect and Not.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: SinnyVic on March 13, 2014, 04:46:00 PM
Personally, I don't believe that you'll find your soul mate by following your personal preferences.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Juice Box on March 14, 2014, 03:13:41 AM
Because, I don't know--if you have an imperfect partner, then he'll try to be perfect for you, which I personally think is better than perfection itself. See my signature for more details.

I think your signature says it best, but doesn't that create a sort of implicit desire for your perfect mate? If the best kind of person you personally could be with is one who always tries to make themselves better for you, that type of person is more "perfect" than the alternative. That imperfection makes them perfect. The trick, of course, being that for that phrase to work, the word "perfect" is slightly different, but that last word in the phrase--the "makes humans perfect"--heavily implies that there is a personal standard of perfection being met.

um what

Well, I just sort of think that someone who is "perfect for you" in the sense that he/she has all your likes and dislikes, will not be "perfect for you" in that lovey-duvey way.

Has all your likes and dislikes (eg: Perfect for you) =/= Good life partner
Does not have all your likes and dislikes (eg: Not perfect for you) + Tries to be "perfect" for you (even though he/she will never be) = Good life partner

It's hard to understand, I know.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Ferdk on March 14, 2014, 11:03:58 PM
My two cents:

No, because souls don't exist. Therefore how can someone "mate" your soul if you don't have one? Ok wordplay aside, it's a spiritual concept and I don't believe in anything metaphysical, paranormal or magical or whatever term you want to put to it. The concept makes no logical sense, and I operate only by logic (except when enraged then I'm just a dumb wild animal, but I digress).

I know Lan is loving the fact that I'm contributing so much to his topic :)
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Merlandese on March 15, 2014, 04:37:59 AM
My two cents:

No, because souls don't exist. Therefore how can someone "mate" your soul if you don't have one? Ok wordplay aside, it's a spiritual concept and I don't believe in anything metaphysical, paranormal or magical or whatever term you want to put to it. The concept makes no logical sense, and I operate only by logic (except when enraged then I'm just a dumb wild animal, but I digress).

I know Lan is loving the fact that I'm contributing so much to his topic :)

First off, we all hate you.

Second, I guess in my mind, the concept of a Soul Mate, even if "metaphysical" in nature, kind of corresponds to a set of ins and outs that have an exact parallel. Like, if all of our values were charted into minutia, and there was a way to balance out our success, happiness, productivity, etc. by the charted values of another "product," that product would be an exact compliment to us. So, in logical terms, there's a way to balance out the flaws of our values (and even what we perceive as "flaws" or "values" are susceptible to this balancing). To reach a perfect equilibrium among two products would and could be a perfect pairing, and also could be described in the non-logical term "Soul Mates."

Basically, imagine that you're a team of players in an MMORPG, but you have a severe weakness because you're missing the other teammate. For your type, there's a teammate that has exactly the products needed to roound out your team. Maybe they have the stats that balance your team out, and they're perfect because you need to win every fight flawlessly. Or maybe they have awful stats, but your value is that you want to have fun, so just how they act in battle makes them someone you always choose.

It's a treasure hunt for sure, but the unlikeliness of the treasure being possible to find doesn't immediately indicate that the treasure doesn't exist. To correlate "likeliness" and "existence" in that way would be a way of justifying a lack of success, rather than pursuing the idea rationally.

The idea isn't that we all know what we want. The idea is that there's a concept of a perfect balance between you and someone else that is possible. If there's one person--whether you know how they should be or not--that can make both your and their values at the most optimal level, that idea is basically what a Soul Mate is. And then it comes to the question of whether you think pairings can be optimal, maybe?

Just shooting more stuff out there. XD
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Ferdk on March 15, 2014, 01:37:49 PM
My two cents:

No, because souls don't exist. Therefore how can someone "mate" your soul if you don't have one? Ok wordplay aside, it's a spiritual concept and I don't believe in anything metaphysical, paranormal or magical or whatever term you want to put to it. The concept makes no logical sense, and I operate only by logic (except when enraged then I'm just a dumb wild animal, but I digress).

I know Lan is loving the fact that I'm contributing so much to his topic :)

First off, we all hate you.

Second, I guess in my mind, the concept of a Soul Mate, even if "metaphysical" in nature, kind of corresponds to a set of ins and outs that have an exact parallel. Like, if all of our values were charted into minutia, and there was a way to balance out our success, happiness, productivity, etc. by the charted values of another "product," that product would be an exact compliment to us. So, in logical terms, there's a way to balance out the flaws of our values (and even what we perceive as "flaws" or "values" are susceptible to this balancing). To reach a perfect equilibrium among two products would and could be a perfect pairing, and also could be described in the non-logical term "Soul Mates."

Basically, imagine that you're a team of players in an MMORPG, but you have a severe weakness because you're missing the other teammate. For your type, there's a teammate that has exactly the products needed to roound out your team. Maybe they have the stats that balance your team out, and they're perfect because you need to win every fight flawlessly. Or maybe they have awful stats, but your value is that you want to have fun, so just how they act in battle makes them someone you always choose.

It's a treasure hunt for sure, but the unlikeliness of the treasure being possible to find doesn't immediately indicate that the treasure doesn't exist. To correlate "likeliness" and "existence" in that way would be a way of justifying a lack of success, rather than pursuing the idea rationally.

The idea isn't that we all know what we want. The idea is that there's a concept of a perfect balance between you and someone else that is possible. If there's one person--whether you know how they should be or not--that can make both your and their values at the most optimal level, that idea is basically what a Soul Mate is. And then it comes to the question of whether you think pairings can be optimal, maybe?

Just shooting more stuff out there. XD

Shut up.

Now about you said. I understand your logic but it's flawed by a simple variable that blews the formula: People aren't static. You may have some core values, sure, but we're not the same person all the time. You may find someone who matches you today, someone who can complement the person you're today, but that doesn't mean you both will evolve to complement each other when you grow out of your current phase.
I'm a different person pretty much everyday, I doubt there's even an infinitecimal possibility of someone who magically changes as much as I do and in a specific way to complement me each day.

And if you dumb down the argument to our "core values", then you're not really talking about a perfect match. You're talking about someone who complements maybe the important things about you, but not all of you. It would be a good match to have around, but it's not a Soul Mate, and if we do go that route of simplifying it to that point, then there's a huge chance that there are thousands of soul mates for each, not the single one. The single soul mate idea is based on a perfect match, which is literally impossible, as far as I can reason it.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Merlandese on March 15, 2014, 07:10:58 PM
Now about you said. I understand your logic but it's flawed by a simple variable that blews the formula: People aren't static. You may have some core values, sure, but we're not the same person all the time.

And here's the flaw with that logic. I agree completely that our growth as people is dynamic, but that's also a variable that could be considered in what makes the complimenting product a perfect one. If people aren't static, that means that the people they are with also aren't static. If you have two people who compliment each other perfectly in a static position, and not in a dynamic position, then that wouldn't be a perfect compliment. It'd be "good for right now." In the most hypothetical of Soul Mate ideas, this person will be perfect for you always; not because who they are and who you are will never change, but because you both continuously change in sync. This "dynamic" idea that you bring up would be just another aspect of how a person could be your Soul Mate, not an obstacle to it.

If your favorite food was steak, and you had a self-replicating steak, that'd be your Soul Food... Mate. Bear with me. But then you get tired of steak, grow up, and want a bit of ice cream. Well, for that Soul Food to be truly perfect for you, it would then turn into ice cream. That may be impossible for food, but you said people aren't static, and it follows that you can assume a Soul Mate would have this transformation quality.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Fl0x on March 15, 2014, 08:09:24 PM
For a more visual way of representing this, have this randomly generated graph.

(https://freebirdgames.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi62.tinypic.com%2F20at4ex.jpg&hash=4d3a4f8e26227faf76cb38ca80fee2c7)
(Also, it's a .jpg!)
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Ferdk on March 15, 2014, 08:31:03 PM
And here's the flaw with that logic. I agree completely that our growth as people is dynamic, but that's also a variable that could be considered in what makes the complimenting product a perfect one. If people aren't static, that means that the people they are with also aren't static. If you have two people who compliment each other perfectly in a static position, and not in a dynamic position, then that wouldn't be a perfect compliment. It'd be "good for right now." In the most hypothetical of Soul Mate ideas, this person will be perfect for you always; not because who they are and who you are will never change, but because you both continuously change in sync. This "dynamic" idea that you bring up would be just another aspect of how a person could be your Soul Mate, not an obstacle to it.

I already considered this concept in my post and I said it is virtually impossible for someone like that to exist, even with the billions of people in the world. A perfect dynamic match is nigh impossible to exist given the variables.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Fl0x on March 15, 2014, 08:46:47 PM
...and here's a graph for that. This time, a gif.

(https://freebirdgames.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi60.tinypic.com%2F2remp29.gif&hash=3a29c516d552daa41df53a139886c43b)

Clearly, the chances of random values changing in sync is not very likely, but not impossible.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Ferdk on March 15, 2014, 08:51:13 PM
...and here's a graph for that. This time, a gif.

(https://freebirdgames.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi60.tinypic.com%2F2remp29.gif&hash=3a29c516d552daa41df53a139886c43b)

Clearly, the chances of random values changing in sync is not very likely, but not impossible.


We're talking, potentially, over the course of a lifetime. Too many astronomical coincidences need to happen for it to allign perfectly. If something like that was possible I'd be willing to believe in Intelligent Design. And I'm a hardcore atheist, so that should tell you something XD
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Merlandese on March 15, 2014, 09:11:59 PM
I think the Steak/Ice Cream graph is clear science! XD

Saying the likelihood of it is astronomical is, again, an aspect of Soul Mate-dom. The concept of a Soul Mate isn't typically grounded in a one-in-a-million logic, it's grounded in a one-in-the-entire-human-population concept. If you can admit it's possible that the person exists, whether they are ever found or not, then that's an essential acknowledgement of Soul Mates. You can call them something else if you like.

I think I'm more figuring this out myself as I try to explain it. XD Like, if I shot a cannon at random in hopes that the cannonball landed on a birthday cake after going through a basketball hoop in the next town over, I might never make it. But the possibility that it could happen can be given a name. In this case, Jecht Shot VII, but maybe Soul Shot also works. So denying the likelihood of the shot and denying the existence of the shot as a possibility aren't the same thing. It'd be like, "Yes, I believe the Soul Shot can be done, but I think it never will be." I don't know what that concludes, but it's interesting enough.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Ferdk on March 15, 2014, 10:23:44 PM
Well but then there you have 2 different concepts.

First we were talking if Soul Mates definitely existed, and then you added you'd probably never find them given the circumstances. Now you're switching to whether the concept is mathematically plausible, that's a whole different thing. The first one is you have 1 soul mate per 7 billion people (give or take). The 2nd concept is you have 1 soul mate per the infinite amount of possible matchmakings existing and non-existing-but-mathematically-plausible. It's a whole other level of unlikeliness that I would gladly conclude is as good as non-plausible.

Finding your soulmate between the 7 billion people would be landing the cannonball through a hoop in the next town over. A soulmate even existing would be the equivalent of farting and creating a chemical reaction that accelerates the growth of the sun making it implode and obliterating the solar system while this creates a blackhole that sucks the galaxy itself reshaping the observable universe into the shape of a unicorn in a ballet tutu. It's just as good as impossible.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Merlandese on March 15, 2014, 10:28:10 PM
A soulmate even existing would be the equivalent of farting and creating a chemical reaction that accelerates the growth of the sun making it implode and obliterating the solar system while this creates a blackhole that sucks the galaxy itself reshaping the observable universe into the shape of a unicorn in a ballet tutu.


Dumb and Dumber 'There's a Chance' (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KX5jNnDMfxA#)
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: Kairosh on March 16, 2014, 12:09:10 AM
So, it's likely you will never met the one. But, there will be many people who fit into your core qualities that will never change. Everyone's not static, so obviously we change our smaller qualities, and other's too. But, the person might try to change to your likes, to your qualities. And you might too. It's that desire to fill the other's needs, that makes a long relationship.

Let's say, I like people who light, brown eyes. I find a nice girl who has light brown eyes, fits my core qualities, and coincidentally, likes me too. We have a long relationship. In that long relationship, I might change my opinions, and find girls with piercing blue eyes better than light brown eyes. But that doesn't mean that I will automatically hate the girl I'm currently with. Sure, her eyes won't be as appealing, but I still like her for her core qualities. Our opinions might change, but the core qualities won't change.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: TKano on March 19, 2014, 06:17:52 AM
I'm not gonna go too deep into this one, but I've always believed that when you look for your special one, you might not find him/her.

Because sometimes, you're being saved for another great person.
Title: Re: Do Soul Mates Exist?
Post by: SinnyVic on March 25, 2014, 03:23:23 PM
Lol this discussion just went in a full circle.

I wouldn't really put too much effort into trying to interpret a concept.