Author Topic: Thank you so much guys!  (Read 470 times)

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TheFlyingMarlin

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Thank you so much guys!
« on: May 27, 2018, 02:29:38 PM »
Hey guys, apologies in advance for this super long, sentimental post, but on this occasion, I couldn't not say something about this. Also, I realize that it's a long retrospective post about my experiences on the forum, but, rest assured, I am not leaving :P .

Today, after four years of study, I graduated from college (or uni), with a Bachelor of Arts in Mathematics and Asian Studies! It's been quite a journey, and I am, for better or for worse, a different person than the guy I was when I started coming here. I'm a lot less wide-eyed, optimistic, or extroverted now than when I left high school. I'm gonna talk about a few things you might not know about me, but I think you guys deserve to know. I have so much to say and want to thank all of you, but if it's all the same, I don't want to single anyone out by name.

When I came to college, certain things about me changed. I started to experience severe anxiety and depression, and although I thought these would just be passing things, they have persisted. I became, for all intents and purposes, a recluse. Even though my social life hadn't been the best in high school, it was way better than the social life I had here. About a month after I started college, I was bored, so I decided to sit down and play a game which I had received in a Humble Bundle alongside RPG Maker a few months prior. As you may guess (or have heard me say before), that game was To the Moon. It would become my favorite game, and one could say it even motivated me. A few months later, on April 12, 2015, while looking for RPG Maker resources, I stumbled across the Freebird Games forum. After briefly looking around the forum, I decided to sign up.

It would be an understatement to say that this was a good decision.

This forum gave me people to talk to. It's not every day when I meet someone who has the same interests as me, much less in an indie game like To the Moon. In a time when I found it hard to be social, I have found myself extremely lucky to be a member of this amazing community. I'm not sure how my college experience would have been, or if I would have even graduated, had I not joined this forum.

Throughout the first few months, I was filled with wonder and intrigue. I remember hanging out in the IRC (RIP), where I made friends with a lot of you. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only member who misses the IRC, but it's really how I got to know a lot of you guys, and it had a general atmosphere unlike Discord, Skype, or any other platform. I also remember playing those silly forum games, and getting really excited whenever I saw a new post on the forum. Pretty soon, my friendships with many of you guys made their ways off the forum and onto other platforms. That was really cool.

I can't talk about my time on this forum without talking about the first half of the year 2016. If you were around then, you might remember that I started the year with a month-long trip to China and Japan, as part of my college's Asian studies program. This might have been (by some definitions) the best month of my life. I bonded with my classmates and experienced four amazing cities. I would be willing to do (pretty much) anything to relive that trip. I remember telling you guys about it (and posting a travelogue with a bunch of pictures), and everyone got excited for me. That was really fun. I should also mention that during this trip, I played the pacifist run of Undertale. Undertale is a game which has resonated with me a lot, and I would not have played it had it not been for this forum.

However, the months to follow (the second semester of my sophomore year) were not as kind to me. My anxiety and depression had flared up, and on many days I found it difficult to wake up before the afternoon. I missed a lot of classes, and I found very little motivation. But you guys were there. I remember the chats, the late-night Skype meetups (which were probably not good for my sleep schedule :P ), and the general sense of community which was so awesome. I remember listening to the QTBV soundtrack while sitting in the library at night catching up on reading, and checking the forum during breaks. I remember that it was during this time that I joined the top ten leaderboard for most time online :P .

To be honest, even right now, things could be better. I am leaving college full of regrets. There are many things I have really wanted to do, but didn't. I still feel like I'm not ready to leave. There are people I wish I could have become closer to, and there have been many opportunities I have let fall by the wayside. There are many things I wish I could have done differently. But there's one thing I wouldn't change: My time on this forum. Trading away my time on this forum (all 69 days -- wait, that's a lot of time, that didn't help my IRL social life) would be (reference totally intended) wishing my life away. I'm also filled with great uncertainty regarding my future. I don't have any plans for work or anything, and I'm really not sure what's in store for me. But my time on this forum has opened me up to much of this world, which I will elaborate in the next part.

This forum is the cornerstone of my online presence, and it has opened up so much to me. Heck, I wouldn't have gotten into speedrunning (and subsequently met even more amazing people) had I not joined this forum. Of course, this forum has changed; many of the people who hung around in this community back in 2015 and early 2016 (those nostalgic times for me) may not really be active here anymore. As much as I would love for this community to be as active as it was back then (and, apparently, in years prior), I realize there's not really much I could personally do, but I still have hope for the future. And my time here hasn't been sunshine and rainbows 100% of the time. But I still am looking forward to the years to come, and the fun to be had in the future.

If you're still reading this, thank you very much. You guys are amazing, and I don't think you guys realize how much you've helped me. Feels good to be done with school! :D

Reives

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #1 on: May 27, 2018, 07:08:29 PM »
Congratz, Marlin; that's a big step. :) And it's wonderful to hear that the forum has had a positive influence on you. Having some regrets about things not tried is perfectly natural, and perhaps you could use that as a motivator to take up more chances that you would like to go for in the future.

Perhaps you'd find yourself in the same shoes, but personally (and for most of the folks I heard from), the direct stuff learned from those years in terms of knowledge never really played too much of a role later on; but it's the unexpected peripheral things from those years that come back in a weird way to help. Either way, hope you had some memories to think back on regardless. Gratz again, and best wishes going onward!

Dragon Mage

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #2 on: May 28, 2018, 01:04:53 AM »
Wow. I didn't realize how much Freebird helped you though these hard times. Then again a small welcoming community can really liven up someone's spirits. It's like moving from the city to the country side (actually I'm not sure if that's the best explanation ^^; )

As for opportunities, don't worry. I've missed and thrown away my own fair share and wish I was a better self motivator but eventually we'll find a drive and a reason to do these things and heck, those opportunities may come back around again! You just never know!

Here's to a better future and maybe the return of the forum chat (but I still like Discord) :P

EatingToastYay

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #3 on: May 28, 2018, 11:10:30 AM »
Wow, congrats on your graduation! I don't think I was here when you first joined the forum, but it's so great that this community helped keep you afloat through those years  :seraismile: I've not even graduated high school yet, so I don't have much valuable life advice, but keep on keeping on Marlin!

fenzil

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #4 on: May 28, 2018, 01:37:31 PM »
Congrats on the degree(s?)! I remember when you first joined. I understand the things about missed opportunities even though I'm only halfway through college, so many people I wish I made friends with who I'll never see again.

I've never noticed how many people are missing now from 3-4 years ago. My first stage of activity on this forum was late 2014 and there were people back then who I kinda forgot about until this post  D': There's something nice about small forums like this one, when it comes to making friends, that big social media sites can't compete with. I've never made friends on Twitter or Instagram, it's just shouting into the void and if you're lucky a spambot will like your post. Kitchen sellers are a lot more interesting than the Twitter bots, that's for sure. I hope small forums will continue to exist 20 years from now.

I've not even graduated high school yet

You're not even born yet!

PM me for Steam profile link

EgotisticalRaven

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #5 on: May 28, 2018, 09:47:22 PM »
It is so good to see someone else has been helped from these forums! These forums mean a lot to me as well, and the people here have helped me through hard times, when I had no other friends to rely on. Even though this isn't the most active place, as Fenzil said, these forums have helped me to make some amazing friends! Despite the fact that there have been some toxic people on these forums every now and then, Freebirdia has always been filled with some pretty good people! And you are one of the good people, Marlin, you haven't turned toxic yet, anyway. :P

I've not even graduated high school yet

You're not even born yet!


Toast must be really smart to be able to be in High School while not even being born!  XD
PoisonRabbit is dead, the EgotisticalRaven ate it.

Dragon Mage

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #6 on: May 29, 2018, 04:21:17 AM »
Despite the fact that there have been some toxic people on these forums every now and then
Who? I remember DuckBiscuit but he was like a troll who made one post.

EgotisticalRaven

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #7 on: May 29, 2018, 07:11:08 AM »
Despite the fact that there have been some toxic people on these forums every now and then
Who? I remember DuckBiscuit but he was like a troll who made one post.
I don't want to stir up any drama, so I won't mention anyone. Sorry.  :reivsweat:

Just forget I ever said anything...
« Last Edit: May 29, 2018, 07:13:28 AM by EgotisticalRaven »
PoisonRabbit is dead, the EgotisticalRaven ate it.

Kyo

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #8 on: May 29, 2018, 07:57:52 AM »

Eli

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Re: Thank you so much guys!
« Reply #9 on: May 29, 2018, 01:56:23 PM »
That's great to hear Marlin!
Congratulations on your graduation!

I'm hopeful that at some point you will find some job or craft that can give you joy, and after enjoying what you do the rest of the path should become more clear.

 


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